Saturday, January 20, 2007

odd, this not really having any definite plans for tomorrow...

i've declared myself unambitious recently, but maybe that is part of the goal. to conduct my life in such a way that the prospect of a free day brings on a sense of heady delight and freedom rather than dread of boredom... while not eliminating such days entirely. it's a form of balance.

i lost a week of local, normal time. i got sick, stayed home for two days, loaded up on tylenol enough to work through one, then headed to soflex across four. coming back fuzzy-headed and out of the loop. but still delighted.

i tossed the more expensive half of my plane ticket. convoluted story, but it didn't really matter -- i got back as soon as i would've. and deepened a couple friendships in the process. this sort of thing matters.

i've had lousy luck asking people about their experiences during the week i was missing... sick, spent the weekend in severe back pain, lost a parent. i was fishing for happy long-weekend adventures that i could casually one-up with stories of running off the dance floor to the beach and coming back to dance some more sopping wet. dancing can't fix everything. i wish hugs could.

dancing does fix a lot, though. someday i'll get around to writing it out, the "why i dance" essay that lurks around at the edges, just beyond things i have words for.

today was quarterly corporate "mandatory fun." ice skating, this time. we played broomball, and the local curling club gave us a little introduction to curling. who knew knoxville had a curling club? i found myself smiling in recognition -- i'm every bit as serious and geeky about a pursuit that makes very little sense to those outside it. then freeskating... i always loved skating, more rollerskating and rollerblading (i'm southern, after all), but mostly the feeling of gliding along... it was all good, then a chain of people skates by. i nearly yell an obnoxious comment about it being against the rink rules, decide to hold my tongue. a co-worker falls and breaks her nose. blood spattering on the ice. the afternoon shatters.

on to sleeping for a long, long night. because i can.

No comments: